03-36 The Main Reasons for Failure

The Main Reasons for Failure

There are two main reasons for failure. The first is the influence of external stimuli - a commercial, online news articles, internet browsing etc. At a weak moment or even during a social occasion somebody will get intimate with their partner. I have already dealt with this topic at length. Use that moment to remind yourself that there is no such thing as one visit or one peek. Rejoice in the fact that you have broken the chain of mental slavery. Remember that the PMOer envies you, and feel sorry for him. Believe me, he needs your pity. The other main reason for failure is having a bad day. Get it clear in your mind before you start that, whether you are a PMOer or a non-PMOer, there are good days and bad days. It rains for both the pope and the murderer.

Life is a matter of relativity and you cannot have ups without having downs. The problem with the Willpower Method of stopping is that as soon as the PMOer has a bad day he starts moping for his ‘harem’ visit and all that does is make a bad day worse. The non-PMOer is better equipped, not only physically but also mentally, to cope with the stresses and strains of life. If you have a bad day during the withdrawal period just take it on the chin. Remind yourself that you had bad days when you were addicted (otherwise you wouldn’t have decided to stop). Instead of moping about it, say to yourself something like, “OK, today’s not so good but masturbating is not going to cure it. Tomorrow will be better and at least I have got a marvellous bonus at the moment. I have kicked that awful PMO habit.”

When you are a PMOer you have to block your mind to the bad side of PMO. PMOer never have brain fog just “a bit down.” When you are having life’s inevitable troubles you want to PMO but are you happy and cheerful? Of course you aren’t. Once you stop, the tendency is to blame everything that goes wrong in your life on the fact that you have stopped.

Now if your work stresses you out you think, “At times like this I would have PMOed.” That’s true but the important thing you forget is that the PMO didn’t solve the problem and you are simply punishing yourself by moping for an illusory crutch. You are creating an impossible situation. You are miserable because you can’t have the porn and masturbation yet you’ll be even more miserable if you do. You know that you have made the correct decision by stopping PMO so why punish yourself by ever doubting the decision?