Stress
I am referring not only to the great tragedies of life but also to the minor stresses, the socializing, the telephone call, the anxieties of the housewife with noisy young children and so on. Let us use the telephone conversation as an example. For most people the telephone is slightly stressful, particularly for the businessman. Most calls aren’t from satisfied customers or your boss congratulating you. There’s usually some sort of aggravation - something going wrong or somebody making demands. Then he or she comes home to the mundane family life of kids screaming and wife’s emotional demands on you. His already PMO weakened de-stressors are in no way ready to take the aggravation. At that time the PMOer, if he isn’t already doing so, will fantasize the relief of internet porn that he promised himself that night. He will even allow himself to “take one step more” into the ‘forbidden’ area that he had previously self-excluded. He doesn’t know why he does this but he does know that for some reason it appears to help.
What has actually happened is this: without being conscious of it, he has already been suffering aggravation (i.e. the withdrawal pangs). By partially relieving that aggravation at the same time as normal stress, the total stress is reduced and the PMOer gets a boost. At this point the boost is not, in fact, an illusion. The Internet porn user will feel better than before. However, even when using porn to masturbate he or she is more tense than if he were a non-PMOer because the more you go into the drug, the more it knocks you down and the less it restores you when you masturbate. I promised no shock treatment. In the example I am about to give, I am not trying to shock you, I am merely emphasizing that PMO destroy your nerves rather than relax them.
Try to imagine getting to the stage where you cannot get aroused even with a very sexy and attractive partner. Just for a moment pause and try to visualize life where one very lovely and charming woman has to compete and fail with all the virtual porn stars who are in your ‘harem’ to get your attention! Try to imagine the frame of mind of a man who, issued with that warning, actually continues PMOing and then dies without ever having had real sex with this charming and willing real woman. I had read real life stories like that from men and dismissed them as weirdos. In fact, I used to wish a doctor would tell me that this weird condition would happen if I continue PMO; then I would have stopped. Yet I was already fully expecting that PIED and hypofrontality where I am guaranteed to lose in a brain war. I didn’t think of myself as an impotent, just a heavy PMOer. Now, let’s talk about the stress that this is putting on me.
Such weird stories as the above are not fakes. That is what this awful ‘novelty’ porn drug does to you. As you go through life, it systematically takes away your nerve and courage. The more it takes your courage away, the more you are deluded into believing the porn is doing the opposite.
Have you ever been overtaken by panic when you are out on business travel and the hotel WiFi is down or too slow? Non-PMOers do not suffer from it. The internet porn drug causes that feeling. At the same time, as you go through life, PMO not only destroys your nerves but keeps building a powerful neural ‘water slide’, DeltaFosB, progressively destroying your ability to say no.
By the time the PMOer reaches the stage at which it has killed his virility, he believes the PMO is his new girlfriend and cannot face life without it. Get it clear in your head that Internet porn is not relieving your nerves; it is slowly but steadily destroying them. One of the great gains of breaking the ‘habit’ is the return of your natural confidence and self-assurance.
There is no need to self-rate based on your ability to get hard or to satisfy a woman. However, you do ‘know’ deep inside that this is slavery. It is not freedom. And that freedom cannot be achieved by continuing to ‘grease’ - repeating the same behaviour and energizing the ‘water slide’ neural pathways of your brain in ways that undercut your happiness in general and not to mention your libido.